I Think I Am Unemployable :I

I want to make some quick cash and writing doesn't exactly do that for me.  In fact, when I sell an article it could take over a month to get paid.  I am also writing a couple of books but it looks like it could take a long time (if ever!) to profit from these.  A friend of mine has been very kind to pitch some work my way but these are one-time things and they are now at a stand-still until their merger goes through so I am waiting...and waiting.  I do make a bit of money from AdSense (a very little bit) and I continue to write articles but even these I should probably work harder on so I will have more articles in print during any given month...
So what did I do?  I ran to CraigsList.
Oh. My. God.  While I realize CraigsList is an excellent tool for many things (I've used it to sell big items like furniture and had excellent results BTW) and others have used it to find housing, etc, however, when I looked at their job postings the experience left me rather glum.  And then I realized this was the same problem I had when I was in high school and we were told to look through a big book of careers and decide what we wanted to be so the career counselor could put us on the right educational track.  The problem was that none of the jobs--neither from the big book in high school or the giant list of jobs on CriagsList--seemed the least bit interesting to me.
Obviously I have the luxury of being picky, since I don't have to work, but some extra cash right about now would be nice (I've suddenly got the hankering for a new car along with my many travel plans and since we live cash-only that means I need, um, cash--and lots of it--for all of these wants).  And while I have a ton of experience, mostly from being self employed, none of the work I have done actually fits in to a nice job description (the work I do actually ranges across about 20 job descriptions so I am proficient in all but expert in none).
Since I live in Las Vegas there are a lot of service industry jobs here but none sound like a good fit for me either: security (I'm faceblind so that wouldn't work well), waitressing (have you seen the skimpy outfits they wear?  While I'm no prude I know that no one wants to see my 45 year old body in any of those uniforms), bartending (I've never drank and I don't like drunk people.  I did bartend during college but aside from keeping the bar neat and orderly I was probably not the best bartender), hotel housekeeping (ick.  I can barely stand to clean my own bathroom, have you seen how tourists leave their rooms???), casino dealer (hubby did this for a while after he retired and really enjoyed it but then again he really enjoys people, me, not so much, especially if they are smoking like a chimney and whining about losing their money--I would have to logically point out that no one is reaching into their pocket and taking their money, they are making the decision to throw it out the window...and then I would probably launch into a discussion on statistics and then I would probably get fired).  You see the problem...
The only jobs that looked vaguely interesting were laundry sorter (I have Aspergers so repetitive things are rather calming for me), and sign spinner (you know, those people who dance on street corners with signs but I am a red head and this is Las Vegas so I think this would give me a severe case of sun burn...but I could definitely dance on a street corner).
So I think I will take some time this weekend to devise some sort of self employment work that I can do here.  Unfortunately I have no contacts here (which made finding lucrative work in Seattle so simple when I lived there--everyone in the industries I worked in knew who I was so work came to me instead of me hunting down work) but there must be something I can do.  I'll let you know what I come up with...